I had a dilemma when I wanted to write this essay. Oh, I had a great title. It fits the story, and I have a feeling that I would have gotten several hits on the web. However, once the readers read the first paragraph, they might walk away and never return. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I am not the type to sit and worry over how many hits my site gets. I like when the numbers go high, but it’s also nice to know that I have a small following who will read whatever I write, no matter if it is boring, trite, funny, mad, or whatever. This one probably falls in the “whatever” category. The original title was going to be “I Can’t Find My Balls,” but I decided that might sound offensive, so I decided to let you put your own title in the blank above. Once I explain it to you, you will understand.
The Other Day…, I was getting ready for bed. I have a special T-Shirt I like to sleep in. I looked in the closet, not there. I looked in the drawer, even though I knew it wasn’t in there. I went back to my totally spotless utility room, and I found it on a hanger. Good, it would be nice and clean. I went to put it on and got hit over the head by the laundry ball that was stuck in the sleeve. I shouted to my wife, “I found my balls,” even though it was only one ball. However, like the late, great broadcaster Paul Harvey here’s “the rest of the story.”
I probably do about a zillion loads of laundry a week. The dirty towels always somehow seem to multiply when I’m not looking. Anyway, my wife sent away for these wool dryer balls. The purpose of these balls is to allow for better airflow throughout your laundry, meaning you use less energy to run your dryer and reduce drying time. They also serve as a replacement for fabric softeners and remove static electricity. They really do work, but they are sneaky! They can easily hide in the sleeves of your clothing. Most of the time, I find them in a shirt or sweater sleeve. I never worried much about it. They would turn up eventually, right? Then, one day I lost ball number four! The other five came up missing, and I was able to recover them. However, I couldn’t find ball number four. I looked high and low. I went through my closet and took the clothes out, and searched every single sleeve. Nothing! I gave up. My wife ordered two more sets of these dryer balls. Mainly because I had lost so many that now we were down to four. I found one of them shortly after she ordered a new batch. I was proud of myself. Yes, I actually did yell, “Hey, I found my balls!” again.
So you see, I could have been crass and entitled this entry, “I Can’t Find My Balls!” But, truth be told, I am turning red just writing about it. However, it does make for a good story, doesn’t it? By the way, for full disclosure, I now have a total of 18 wool laundry balls to worry about. I wonder how long I will have to wait for one of them to come up missing. You know it will happen. Hopefully, you won’t come back here someday and read that I have lost all but four of them again. But, anyone who really knows me knows that it could happen.
Hey, I hope that your laundry woes, like all your woes, will be easily solved. Until next time, enjoy these last beautiful days of summer. MUH!!
